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Loosing interest in hubby

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asehpe

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Posts: 169
#271
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ValGal,

I'll second I_A_S_P's advice. From your post, I see that you are not breaking apart, and that your newfound 'empty home' actually has some blessings in it -- the sense of peace.

I'd see it as an opportunity to find more about yourself and what you want.

I hope you (and ex-hubby) won't delve into your feelings for each other. I hope you'll also know how to avoid the blaming game (be it yourself, be it ex-hubby). My guess is that both of you suffered with this, and that ex-hubby lied to himself (herself?) and was in some senses as confused by the way things evolved as you yourself.

Ex-hubby apparently needs to find his (her?) own path. That will be his/her life adventure, let us wish him the best.

You also have to find yours, after whatever period of rest and peace you see as necessary for yourself. A period to reconnect with yourself, as someone who is not defined, not only by being with a man, but by any other people -- parents or relatives. Don't get me wrong -- it's wonderful that you've had some success in reconnecting with old friends and family. But in your life, you are the one permister making the decisions.

ValGal, I have really come to admire you and your strength. If I had gone through want you went through (or whatever equivalent scenario you'd imagine, since I'm a man), I don't know what I would have done, and how I would have come out at the other end. Certainly not unbrowniehed.

Get some rest. Then stand tall, look around, and check the possibilities. Decide what you want to do, where you want to go, and go there.

My sincerest best wishes.
I_A_S_P

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Posts: 1037
#272
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ValGal; We miss you, Girl! I am hoping rays of sunshine are chasing your darkness away. Again, I feel that if you focus on things local, you will find all your blessings to be close at hand! I understand. ...
..............PSEUDO PERSON...YMMV!
cuckjay

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Posts: 279
#273
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She is a really cool chick. I hope she comes back too.
boherkyle

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Posts: 23
#274
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Well it seems ive just arrived when everything is over .Not to worry its the story of my life
duufus

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Posts: 43
#275
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thank you valgal..

as a prospective cuck i found this thread of immense value

and to all who've actively participated in here a thank you is in order...

good luck to you all

sincerely duufus
"men in general judge more from appearances than from reality.All men have eyes,but few have the gift of penetration." Niccolo Machiavelli
myalleymyalley

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Posts: 28
#276
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Agree
I_A_S_P

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Posts: 1037
#277
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Just bumping ValGal up to let our little sweetheart know that she has made many friends here. All of us care for her and none of us are forgetting her.

.
..............PSEUDO PERSON...YMMV!
draclif69

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#278
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Second that
ValGal

Member


Posts: 94
#279
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Wow - it's been about two and a half years since my last post in here...I was really surprised to see my thread still out there.

Nothing particularly earth-shattering to post, as I've pretty much cut myself off from all remnants of that "other" life. Haven't spoken to my ex-hubby or any of the guys from back then, and for the most part, I've just kept to myself and tried to enjoy life.

I suppose I still relive some of these times in my head, alternating between regrets, warm feelings and a definite sense of "what was I thinking?".

More than anything, I still mourn the loss of my hubby. He wasn't exactly much of a man in some ways, but he was my best friend, confidant and kindred spirit for most of my life. I haven't seen or heard from him in a long time now, but I can say with authority that if I had it all to do over, I'd happily surrender all of the extra-curricular stuff, if it meant I could have kept him and the life we once had.

Anyway, I guess I've outgrown the urge to cuckold anyone, and I'm not sure I will be posting in here again - but I do want to offer my belated and heart-felt thanks to all of you who tried to share your perspectives along the way.
draclif69

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#280
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Thanks ValGal. I'm sure I speak for quite a few people here that we greatly value your sharing a deeply permisteral part of your life with us....especially one that gave me so much vicarious pleasure. Good luck to you!
redimac

Anonymous

#281
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ValGal:
enjoy life

you will...
Deepelmdesciple

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#282 · Edited by: Deepelmdesciple
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Linda38DD

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#283
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Val gal I certainly understand..Been there lucky for me the guy was hung up on left me before I could do something rash..I see him (my lover) every friday when he picks up his mister,while it brings back memories I am now glad it worked out the way it did.
asehpe

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Posts: 169
#284 · Edited by: asehpe
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Valgal,

you're welcome. I'm sure I speak for many here if I say I wish your life will be full of contentment and happiness.

Losing a permister with whom one once shared so much, and had so much in common, is a difficult feeling. I think many here (me included) have gone through similar moments.

All in all, life is more intricate (and thus more interesting) than any single thing that happens to us in it. If you'll allow me to enter the Star Trek universe, sometimes it's better to face life as Mr Spock, and sometimes as Cap. Kirk; sometimes we should be Cmdr. Riker, sometimes Cap. Picard; sometimes we're B'Elanna Torres, sometimes we're Tom Paris, sometimes even Cap. Janeway; sometimes we're ridiculous like Quark, sometimes we're tragic like Odo, sometimes we're torn between allegiances like Major Kyra. Sometimes we transcend, like Cap. Sisko, and sometimes we fall lower than we ever thought possible, like O'Brian in primister.

Sometimes we're Oryan slave girls, capturing the desires of others with our bodies; sometimes we're Vidiians dying painfully from the phage, turning into physically (and morally) repulsive monsters as we die. Sometime's we're Q, jokingly jumping from place to place, omnipotent, omniscient (and yet strangely bored with the Q-continuum...). Sometimes we're Trills with a symbiont in our bellies and memories from seven previous lives. Sometimes we're a Klingon with a strong sense of military honor, and then we turn into a bragging one who just wants more redwine and another bowl of gagh. Sometimes we're Sarek, full of wisdom and diplomacy, or T'Pol, with repressed anarchic *******er instincts. Sometimes we're on Risa, flirtatiously walking around with our horgh'ahns, ready for kinky jamaharon sex. And sometimes we're in the Vulcan monastery of P'Jem, participating in ancient ascetic rituals, detached, full of deep and cosmic thoughts and feelings... (but beware! P'Jem is not as it looks...)

Sometimes we feel powerful and strong, like Worf marrying Jadzia Dax ('and they *******ed the gods who had created them, and stood tall, independent and free...'), sometimes powerless and weak, like Dr. Bashir trying to cure the Blight, and failing precisely because of the advanced technology he was so proud of... Sometimes we live and thrive, we show the best in ourselves, because of an ideal that attracts us, like the Voyager crew trying to return to the Alpha quadrant; sometimes we delude ourselves and eventually self-destruct despite that, like the Silver Blood copies of the Voyager crew, trying to merely go on existing but ultimately dying without even being noticed, empty and unremembered...

And so many other things, good and bad.

And all of that is because we're alive.

All of us. You, too.

Take care.
I_A_S_P

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Posts: 1037
#285
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asehpe

Really?
..............PSEUDO PERSON...YMMV!
asehpe

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Posts: 169
#286
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I_A_S_P,

pretty much.
tallbucks2

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Posts: 23
#287
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ValGal
Hi Jennifer,

Although I agree that you are a great writer and your picture shows that you are beautiful in the looks department, I want to include how I see it from the eyes of an 82 year old guy who has been married 60 years.
Your husband may be a masoquist, but have you ever considered getting him help. How did he get to be that way? Now you are feeding his negative tendencies for your own ends. Once he has the help of a psychiatrist, I'm sure he would be much happier having a beautiful wife totally for himself. Instead you are possibly thinking that now that he has mental problems, how can I take advantage of it for my own selfish ends. You say that he has a small dick and premature ejaculations. That sexually his sexual intercourse does not give me an organism. Well there are things medically that cure this. For your information the average man's cock is 5.14" long according to a doctor's written medical report. The total cock lengths that are 6.3" or longer are in the 95 percentile group. That means that only 5 out of 100 cocks are 6.3" or over in length. That is measuring from the pelvic bone at the base of the cock (not from the fat and skin on the pelvic bone) to the very tip of the cock.

The thickness of the cock is an average of 5 inches in circumphrence (measured around it). It can be thickened by grafting skin around the cock. That could solve the premature ejaculation problem because the extra skin around the cock would reduce sensitivity. As people get older the sex drive of husbands slows down. That can be fixed, too. I read that some people can cum 3 times when they are younger. I kept up a count of my climaxes in one session. It did come to 3. I am an inventor/ scientist who has very high wealth without my wife working throughout my marriage. My cock is 71/4c with width 7" in circumphrence. So I am not speaking from any jealousy based on cock size. I am just trying to be helpful. I have problems of my own as written in another post. They are well on the way to getting resolved.

I can figure solutions pretty easily. I currently have a solution for the covid-19 virus, which includes living to 120 years with quality of life including a good sex drive. The FDA likes it and my patented medical devices are going for approval.


I care.
tallbucks
tallbucks2

Member


Posts: 23
#288 
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The above post to Jennifer Allen also applies to your situation. In addition some observation applies to you ValGal. Therupy sessions sessions are on a lower level; whereas your Husband needed a top flight psychiatrist to dig into his youth to find out what horrendous event that he can't remember made him eventually turn into a transgender. You will remember Tom the professional said that your husbands problems came from something from his youth. Perhaps a phsychiatrist will have him ********** to draw it out of him. Once he knows the causes of his problem, he can face them and rebound back to being hetrosexual. But rather than get him cured, you used his symptoms to give you justification for having sex with others.

BF number 1 left you because he wanted a wife who will be totally his mutually. You might write him a light note saying that you are now divorced and ask him how he is doing.

I care.
tallbucks
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Loosing interest in hubby
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