unwittingly been cuckold - any advice

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! JUST SPENT THE LAST CUPPLA HOURS READIN ' THIS (FASCINATING) THREAD BRAVO,OVERWHELMED FOR A FANTASTIC STORY!!!!! I FOUND MYSELF WONDERING ALA MR DIAMONDMAKER WHETHER THIS MIGHT BE A MAKE-UP JOB????
IF IN FACT THIS IS FICTION I BOW DOWN TO A SUPERB FABULIST!!!!
AND IF IN FACT THIS IS FACT(haha)......OVERWHELMED,YOUNG MAN....WELCOME TO THE CLUB FOR YOU ARE IN THE RIGHT PLACE AND INDEED ARE A cUCKOLD!!!!
GOTTA ADMIT I'M STILL NOT SURE ,BUT LEANING TOWARDS A MASTERFULL STORY BY ABOUT A 60/40 RATIO??
QUITE FRANKLY I'M NOT SURE IT MATTERS A HECK OF A LOT EITHER WAY AS IT HAS LED TO SO MUCH RESPONSE AND THOUGHT PROVOKING COMMENTARY!!!
I'VE FOUND MYSELF WONDERING IN GENERAL ON THIS SITE AS TO THIS QUESTION ALSO BUT USUALLY HAVE A CLEARER OPINION/GUESS.
SO BROTHER AND SISTERS WHAT DO YOU THINK????
P.S. OVERWHELMED....i JUST REALIZED THAT MY LABELLING YOU AS I HAD TO BE KINDA CRASS,GIVEN THE STRONG EMOTIONS INVOLVED! i MYSELF IDENTIFY SO COMPLETELLY WITH THE CONCEPT AND EMBRACE THE LIBERATING FEELINGS POSSIBLE THAT I THINK I TRANSFERRED MY OWN (ADMITTEDLY CONFLICTED/TWISTED)MIND SET TO YOUR UNIQUE SITUATION...............MEA CULPA
Who's Your Bitch.single,cuz not man enuf to attract a woman.
Will meet for sissy sex with yor cuck!!

Yes, I'm still alive.

overwhelmed:

Working under the presumption you and your story are real and true (my native assumption), you still don't get it. She is not your woman anymore, perhaps never was. She is merely using you while she fucks around, and she always will. Like a pet farm dog that has tasted the live red of a sheep and hence can not be trusted ever again as a farm dog, you can never put any trust in her. She has tasted, and continues to taste, strange cock. She'll never give up cheating on you now. Even if you two agree to an open or cuckold relation, she'll find ways to cheat on you.

Dump her. Get her out of your life. You've been made a fool of by her, she is still making a fool of you, and by taking her back, you have developed a reputation of delusion for yourself that carries into your work life as well as your entire social life. People will be using you for their own exclusive benefit from now on if you do not immediately and completely remove her from your life.

It is unimportant that you believe you still love her. Fall out of love with her, then move on. Find another woman to love, and even fuck the ex while loving the new woman if you wish (seems the ex just might like that, too!), just be sure to get the cheating bitch out of your love life at the very least.

It seems incredible that anyone (male or female) would tolerate this type and magnitude of misbehaviour in their SO. On the other hand, if this is all just a story, as some have claimed, then move it to the story section and stop stringing us along.

THANKS FOR RETURNING,overwhelmed(and undermanned)....Can't wait for the next episode
Wassup....DiamondMaker69???....Glad to hear You're still following.
Who's Your Bitch.single,cuz not man enuf to attract a woman.
Will meet for sissy sex with yor cuck!!

I wish you all the best. And the advice i've been given will sound more worthwhile, when I come back and say i'm beyond on all this.

overwhelmed

Yes, it is easier to wonder from the outside how anyone can tolerate her misbehaviour. Been there from the inside, done that from the inside. It was very easy to let it slide, as I did for several critical moments in my marriage over several decades. This last time (starting last January), though, which did lead me to this forum, I decided enough was enough, and laid down the law to her as never before, including very graphical descriptions of the consequences to her if she failed to change. Made me sick to the stomach to do it, but I stuck to my guns. I figured she would never concede to me, so in anticipation of the inevitable, went searching for another woman to be my woman (and be her man) for the rest of my life. And found her, amazingly easy and fast, much to my surprise and delight. And told the wife about her. Then a miracle happened! The wife caved in to my demands in a matter of weeks! So I am giving her one last parole period. So far, going very good. Only time will tell, but her time is short to prove to me her genuineness in her "conversion." And she knows that.

Anyway, that is the story behind my advice to you. Learn from my mistakes (waiting too long to put her in her place), and those of others. I am still supporting you, but you must draw the line (which she has already crossed too many times in my opinion) and be willing to cut your losses.

Part of the reality of relations between men and women is that, in spite of their denials, women are so much more ruled by their (sometimes irrational) emotions and feelings (of which sex is the largest single part) than are men that it is unrealistic to expect otherwise of them for any given single moment or man. On the other hand, at least in part, that's why we poor dumb males are attracted to them. The up shot is, be forgiving and tolerant of their sexual and nonsexual behaviour (and misbehaviour, too), require them to be so also of you, but establish and enpower limits. Do not allow them to use your tolerance and patience.

Diamond is right on. Seems he and I have a lot in common about our women. I, too, wanted (and still want) to know all the details of the wife's cheating and rationalizations, both for the eroticism of it and the prevention of it happening that particular way again. And we mere males are also emotional creatures, but we seem more capable of controlling our emotions. That is what you must do, and seem to finally be doing, so that you can indeed heal. Don't know anything about the DVDs Diamond refers to, but I want to find them. Where can they be found, Diamond?

Keep us updated. I am happy to see you are now thinking of recovery and moving on.

Diamond

Sorry, I misinterpreted you. I thought you were referring to a couple of commercial DVDs.

My story is pretty well laid out in my various posts here (and in the other forums here), so I won't go into them now. Part of the resolution of the problems with the wife is we are now working on an open relationship, swinging, swapping, ... I figure, once a cheating wife always a cheating wife (see my analogy to the farm dog in my earlier post above), but if it is done with my knowledge and participation, with limits, then it's OK by me. We are starting with swapping only for now, but may eventually move on to swinging, cuckolding, and bulling on our own.

You are absolutely right, this is a great forum for airing out our thoughts and feelings about cuckolding and swinging and so on. It's been a life saver for me since February. My understanding of women in general, and the wife in particular, has expanded a hundred fold from this site and others that I discovered through this site. Wow, have my eyes been opened to the whats and whys of female behaviour, and that the wife's behaviour is not unusual at all! I don't agree with everything I read here (or even most of it), but enough of it jibes with my experience and with those of other's I respect that I read it all with great interest. By the way, I have not hidden my participation in this site from the wife.

What is your story? And what is the joke list you refer to (with drfarmer as a handle?)?

overwhelmed

I am not ignoring you. Your story is a great catalyst for all our thoughts and concerns, you are helping out all of us as well as getting something in return. Keep us informed.

WELL...overwhelmed....Ya got me hooked!!! Can't wait to hear the next chapter; true or otherwise.
Noticed you said, you'd been together(or will be together?...not sure) this weekend. I for one would be interested in hearing how the sex has been between the two of you??? I know, i'm asking for revelations of intimacy, but given your past candor, with graphic detail of her and her "beaus", I'm curious to know how things are now with you guys in the bedroom???
Who's Your Bitch.single,cuz not man enuf to attract a woman.
Will meet for sissy sex with yor cuck!!

We're on our final legs. I doubt there'll be much more in the way of "stories". i just wish i didn't dwell so much on that.

man, this is crap. this guy is a loserwith a sympathy fetish.get a life

fake!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHOSE posting do you mean DiamondMaker69 0r overwhelmed????

i am far more inclined to believe DM69

great thread here tho!!!

ooze... i'd like to know your reamisters,pleez

thanks,fluff
Who's Your Bitch.single,cuz not man enuf to attract a woman.
Will meet for sissy sex with yor cuck!!

sorry guys, I was referring to overwhelmed's story being fake, not DM's.

Thanks, Diamond, for your own story summary. I appreciate it. I think you ARE being productive, for yourself and for us, by being here in the forums.

My estimate about overwhelmed's story is that it is indeed true. It is really hard to make up such completely weird stuff like that, as any professional fiction writer knows.

Looking back at all the amazing crap the wife unloaded on me for more than 25 years, to this day no one (friends, relatives, counselors, and attorneys) understands why I kept taking her back (e.g., she actually had me arrested for something she did not witness, which she could not have since it didn't happen, could not tell the same version story about twice, where the "hanging" judge himself could not believe she could be serious, and where she still really believes each version of her story about the nonexisting event.). Not sure why myself. Anyway, my story is just as "out there" as overwhelmed's, and I know it to be true.


overwhelmed, keep up updated. Take note of Diamond's quote above. And don't forget to dump her.

overwhelmed

I presume you meant that you were going to throw her out this month, July 2007. I am worried that you won't, and I do not understand why you want to wait, anyway.

Fuck her one last time, a royal fuck if you want, then throw her out. Be done with it. And be done with her. And move on. Find a woman worth keeping, even to cuckold you lovingly if that's what you want.

Ditto Diamondmaker69. Come back with updates. It's been a week.

Im very sorry overwhelemed, but i get a very strong feeling that this has been all or part off fantasy, and for a cuckold fantasy i must admit is very hot! In all respect im not judgeing you, if you are for real my heart goes to you for a certain distance, i have sat here now for the last two hours reading your thread, and being a man, that in fantasy gets extremely excited (for my own reamisters which both my wife and i understand.) about seeing my wife with multiple men, or being cuckolded as such, my perspective, or way may help. having had not so good relations in the past sexually with my wife, we have both learned and grown together as a couple, now this to me is what marrage and being a couple is all about, and i have heard meny others reply to your post saying the same thing in a different way, but the big lesmister lernt for everyone involved here is 100% no sorry 200% of honesty is what truly counts! You must be completely upfront with your partner about how you feel, if you cant do that, then whats the point? They say marrage is an instutute! but it dosnt need to be with the right permister. Your girl flat out lied and cheated on you! not once, but again and again! so obviosly she has no true feelings for you, shes not stupid and knows your hurting, humilliation and hurting to me are two completely different things! Aside from my mister, my wife is the pure light of my life, I worship her! She means a hell of a lot more than the world to me, we have been together now for 13yrs, and as time goes on she gets deeper, and more meaningful, and year after year when we think we cant love each other more than we do! But we discover new things, and new boundries TOGETHER!!!! Permisterally as far as rick is concerned, I would have found his address, rocked up on his doorstep completely unannounced, and excuse my language, but completely fucked him over, put the miserable mister of a bitch in hospitle, Your a man dude! take control!!!! controlPLAY is only something you allow to happen!!! If its against your will, or your decieved by it, then it can only hurt! And thats not what marrage or love is about. This man is purely selfish, and wants to exploit your pretty girl and you all the way for his own satisfaction, if you are true, dont let him, because thats just wrong, and your girl has gone along with it, very willingly, and thats just wrong too!!! If she truly loved you, she couldnt do that to you. Rolle man you hit the spot! a woman needs cofidence and power from her man! I treat my wife like a queen, and she treats me like a king! but in the bedroom i treat her like a complete slut! I call her a bitch, a slut and a total little fuckwhore, Im rough with her, I slam her hard in any hole (when i can, hey im only human!!! we all loose it! lol) and she loves every second of it, begging for more, AND LET ME TELL YOU! SHE TREATS ME JUST THE SAME WAY! AND I LOVE IT TOO! but if she ever cheated on me, or lied to me, then she would be out that fuckin door in two seconds flat!!!! And she knows that, and respects that, as do i, and respect her in turn, because it works both ways, and i have no need to find other women, as she has no need to find other men, because we are HONEST!!!! and RESPECT!!!!!! each other as human beings, and as not only man and wife, but individuals, no body ever owns another permister unless they let them, and we should all be free to be who we are, but when you commit yourself to another permister, and i truly mean completely commit your life to that permister, which is what marrage is all about, then honesty is the only key, and im sorry to say my friend, but your girl has miserably failed you! and regardless of the "slut stage" or whatever! (it is definatly true, but she really hurt you) you need to find a woman who will go thru it with you TOGETHER!!!!! FUCK!!! can i stess it any more????? TOGETHER!!!! TOGETHER!!!! OTHERWISE IT JUST WONT WORK!

hey overwealmed- I saw your post and read some of the replies and yours etc. I feel bad for you. I cant imagine what its like but I thought you might consider what I have to offer. I have had sexual encounters with married and otherwise attached women before and I suspect you may still not know the full story. I could go on for hours but I'll keep it brief. Here are a few facts I've learned from dealing with ladies like yours.

1. Attached women are usually very careful, almost to a fault. They only take chances when their starting to get bored.
2. If you caught her fucking one guy, theres probably at least 10 more you dont know about.
3. Women like youir girl get off on the increased orgasm which comes from the betrayal of fucking another guy behind your back. to suck the cock of your friend or a complete stranger is a huge turnon.
4. They get off on making a fool out of you and joking aboout you behind your back. You would be shocked at the very permisteral things I've been told about the cuck. One girl told a group of us whom she had never met before that her husband liked to jerk off while he sucked her pussy. I guess she considered this to be some kind of excuse for fooling around.
5. If you catch them, its because they wanted you to. Otherwise you wouldnt find a disc or tape. In the old days, she would have just arranged for you to walk in on her with another guy. Anyway, they want you to find out in order to precipitate a break up or because they enjoy your pain and get an even better orgasim from it.
6. The stranger you met on the internet, Rick, is someone she was probably already fucking anyway. He may be the same guy or a friend of the guy on the disc. She may have been with him when you found the disc and maybe was even typing the responses from his computer. The only reamister she wanted to get the disc back was so she could make you think your finding it was an accident.
7. Attached women dont just go to a party with their man, meet a stranger and fuck him in the bathroom. If I wnt to a friends party where I didnt know anyone, the last thing I would do was take the chance of embarrasing myself and my friend by asking a married women if she wanted to fuck right now. If she was coming on to me I would very surrepticiously get her phone number. Your girl was probably already fucking the guy who threw the party and told him that she had a fantasy about fucking a stranger at a party while you were there. The boyfriend arranged for the guy to come, introduced him to you and her and then at a prearranged time they met in the bathroom.
Most girls who are really heavy into the betrayal aspect of this have a host of girlfriends and guys who plan out events like dinner dates, paties, etc and carefully plan out a fuck and suck session while some poor cuck is sitting at the table figuring out the tip, or being occupied by some guy talking about golf. I'm not saying that all of the above has happened to you but I'm guessing at least some of it did. Good luck!
bullcock

bullcock:

Those are very interesting insights. Gets me to thinking more of my wife's cheating and how I am absolutely sure she has not told me the whole story or all the men. Your thoughts jibe with my suspicions. Same for overwhelmed's woman (I hesitate to call her his wife anymore.).

When you get the time and opportunity, I think I can speak for us all here that we would love very much so to hear all of your experiences upon which you are basing your understanding of cheating and cuckolding wives.

Hey farmer- I dont know anything about your situation so I dont mean to say "once a cheater, always a cheater" or anything like that. I'm just saying that this kind of stuff happens a lot.
If I were to tell you all my experiences, I would probably have to start my own forum but I'll give you a recent example. I belong to an organization where I see this couple maybe once a month there and they also live in my neightborhood. They have three small kids. The wife is 34, really cute, with that girl next door kind of look and big boobs and nice body. They are very low key conservative type people but the wife just cant get enough cock. I have been fucking her off and on for about four years now.
She is also fucking another guy in the same organization. She has told me that the H told her that he suspects that I am interested in her but has said nothing about this other guy. So to take advantage of this, she decided to play a little trick on him after one of the meetings. The plan was that after the meeting I would volunteer to help the H change some light bulbs (a two man job, requiring a big ladder which we both had to carry from the garage). The H is sort of a nerdy geek type very smart, but sort of a wise ass. He seemed to be very happy to get me away from his little bride b/c he thinks I spend too much time talking to her.
Before we went to get the ladder, the other guy said he had to go but instead went to another part of the building and hid in a room. While H was occupied changing light bulbs with me, she took a little walk over to where this other guy was and licked his cock (so as to avoid smudging her makeup in any way she did not suck!) , pulled down her workout pants and got reemed doggy style. As you can imagine, it didnt take long for the guy to cum. She was done and back before we were done with the lightbulbs.
This girl is extremely careful. This whole scenario was discussed and practiced for about 6 weeks (The practice part was a lot of fun!). I should also add that they had just got back from vacation and had been gone for a couple of weeks so there was no opportunity to talk about it before "d-day". So she used a signal to let us know it was "on". During the meeting they were standing in front of us and at a specified time she rubbed his back up and down to signal us that the fuck was "on". Later on, I was casually talking to her when the Husband came over and put his arm around her and started to talk to me about the light bulbs not knowing that the joke was on him. That gives you an idea of how well this thing was planned. There were probably about ten or so other people there when this happened.
Also, I should add that this girl's H goes out of town for work and she has one night out a week with the "girls" so she has loads of other opportunities to get laid. The H cant follow her b/c there is only one car and he also has to watch the kids. She wanted to do it this way just for the intensified orgasm she got by making an even bigger fool out him b/c he seems to be so concerned about me and is so oblivious about this other guy.
She has two girlfriends both of whom are also married who also cover for her and come over to the house to pick her up on her night out. Most of the time she does go out with them but every now and then, she gets dropped off at my place or somewhere else while the other girls are at a movie. When she is with me she loves it when I talk about what a "wussie" her H is, etc. and she loves having her hair pulled when I fuck her doggy style.
So anyway, this is one experience which illustrates the point I was making. Whether Bewildered's girl is real or imagined, there are real girls like her out there. Which for me I guess is a good thing. Maybe I should write a book!. lol.
bullcock

Thanks, bullcock. Wonderful example. And I believe it, too. There are several aspects of your story that could easily fit the wife and her fooling me while she cucked me. (Actually, she didn't really fool me, rather I chose to interpret the obvious signs as innocent coincidences. My mistake. Won't make it again.)


There is another handle here in these forums (I forget off hand who) that says every woman goes through a slut stage, whether early or late in adulthood, and that some never outgrow it. Not sure I can wholly embrace that idea/observation, but it does seem to have a lot of merit. I prefer the more modest description "Once a cheating wife, always a cheating wife," in the sense that even if she does not actually return to her cheating ways, she will never forget those days and will always seriously consider the possibility when the next good opportunity and/or excuse comes along to cheat again. That is the perfect description of my wife, even as she denies it today. Anyway, I've "made lemonade out of the lemon" circumstances, taking advantage of her ways to get her into swinging and swapping with other couples. It was quite easy, much to my surprise. Right now, it seems outright cucking and bulling may not be too far into the future (with full disclosure to each other, of course, the only way to go; that way, it isn't cheating).

I think there are a lot more women out there like my wife and the wife you were bulling than we publicly acknowledge. A solid 60% of all husbands cheat on their wives, but a whopping 60% to 80% of all wives cheat on their husbands. That is a whole lot of fucking going on "under the radar."

Tell us more, bullcock.

overwhelmed:

Where are you? Come back to us. I want to hear you kicked her ass out.

I didn't disappear, there's nothing substantively new to add.� I still think about the party, still feel like a fool, how it went down, and what people know about it.� She moved out back in February and I did kick her out.�We started seeing each other again in April and I thought there was a slimmer of possibility until I heard about the party last month. I stopped posting cause I knew I'd be seen as a fool and have learned I was. Granted, completely severing ties is easier said than done, but by the end of the summer, I don't expect to even talking with her anymore.

I have been thinking of bullcock's comments, some of them might be true. And gave me things to think about.

Glad to hear you are slowing getting over her, overwhelmed. It really is better to cut off all ties as abruptly as possible, but at least you are moving in the right direction. What does the end of the summer have to do with anything? Anyway, we all have been made fools by cheating women, but we all find ways eventually to overcome the sinking feeling and the pit in our stomach at the realization of their betrayal and our embarrassment. It does not happen, however, until the situation is put completely behind us, one way or another. Since you are not married, it is much simpler for you to put her behind you: Break all ties as soon as possible. Don't worry about anybody else's reactions. She deserves to be "outed" to her family and your family for what she really is, an untrustworthy tramp. Find another woman or three. You might even consider passing rumors about you cheating on her all along. Or not.

bullcock has some great insights about cheaters. For one, they do what they do because of what they are themselves, not what their husbands or boyfriends are. You actually got lucky to find out about your woman before you married her. Much easier and cheaper and more pain-free to dump her now than after a wedding.

Keep us updated now and then.

Way to go Overwealmed! Ditto to everything Farmer just said.
bullcock

Got here late, but agree w/ bullcock/farmer.

So what are you feelings, now that you have 'discovered" the situation?

They don't call em bitches for nothing....

If you love her, just deal with it. If you are happy.
Maybe you could find other lovers too?

eriko
That's so true, I don't think I'd want to be w/o them....

overwhelmed:

Read the posts under "WTF is she doing" at https://www.cuckoldplace.com/1_32436_0.html

What fuckmywife2 had happen to him and what he did is relevant to your situation.

Tell us what has happened since last you posted on the 19th.