PussyBoi

I have been strugging for some time as to wether or not I was gay. Over the years I have been cucked with delight, on my knees in porn booths and parties with assertive men, taken anally as well. I have always felt enormous guilt after serving a man. I still go back for more. I really adore women so I cant quite understand my fasination with Superior type males. In recent months I have actually had discussions with a couple of Black men in adult shops while they were using me. I felt very uncomfortable but almost spellbound as the same theme occured...I was refered to as a pussyboi by both of them and was told not to be ashamed. The Black men said they were not gay and just liked being in control of smaller submissive types such as me. I was asked about cock size and explained that mine was pretty limp nowadays and I could not achieve penetration any longer.I also keep it shaved smooth at the suggestion of a female friend of mine...she thinks it looks cute, youngish this way. The Black guys both asked me if I liked sucking and serving other mens cocks, I admitted that I did.
They said it was because I was a pussyboi and that it is quite natural to feel the way I do and not to be embarassed about it. Pretty hard for me to admit but I really like the feeling of being in a passive/subordinate role. I need to rub myself like a female to get off since I dont get erect, and no viagra etc dosent work at all, just an injectable solutution can get it even a little erect. Very expensive as well.
I have taken many loads in my mouth and bottom but have not been able to swallow...a huge mental block for me, not sure why.
Anyway I seem to be rambling now, thanks for listening, any comments or advice would be appreciated

I know what you are feeling. I have struggled with it as well. Our solution that works for us is that we both date. I date the kind of men, mostly black men my wife chooses and helps find for me. She gets real delight in getting me ready for a date, shaving, picking out the right "Lucky Panties" It can be real hetic if we are both getting ready. She loves teasing me about what my date will expect and what she will be doing with hers. The best is when we both will be coming home after. I will be home before she so that I can see her entrance. She loves to kiss me and say "We are both cocksuckers tonight" She will feel me up to see if I went all of the way. Then it is all about her, me serving her.

I don't think of self being gay, I lie to myself that I only do this for her, but I do love it. Her friends know and it is hot when one of them will ask if I have gotten any cock latley or what color panties do I have on. One of her friends even buys me panties, she took me shopping one day!

Anyhow rambling, just accept your place and she will allow you to enjoy her.

Ive only ever fancied woman and in no way see myself as bi or gay. yet i have an urge to suck cock, esspecially from what i would call a real man.