our situation

should say it all, after two years its finally becoming a large enough issue that we talk about it, its effecting intimacy and hence all other aspects of our life, we've talked about this lifestyle as an option but need to know more about it and see where things go from there.

Well, talking about it is a start. You both need to be very open minded about it and see how far you are willing to take it, or at least try. You can try anything once and then discuss it to see how each of you felt about the incident. When we first started, I allowed my wife to go out with a guy and get laid...she then came home and told me all the little details...from there we kept getting braver and braver...we could have stopped at any point but the first incident so much blew my mind with enjoyment that I had to keep going further and further...about the only thing we have not done is to have her be in a gang bang with more than two guys, (she has had two, but no more than that) but everything else up to that point has been pure enjoyment for both of us. The journey of 1000 miles starts with the first step, so go on and try things...you both may just be in for the most enjoyable ride of your life.

Thanks Juanito, yeah we have discussed the possibility, and we've tried many other things. Intimacy has just been a system of comprimises and we stopped lying to ourselves at some point and just realized we need to be looking at other options. And although I'm not quite sure we'll take it as far as you did, we would atleast like to find a place where her needs are met and we can go on as usual.

Before we were married things were so exciting emotionally that what was lacking in intimacy just seemed like it would catch up. Well it never did and its taking its toll.

thanks for your advice and understanding, we are keeping our eyes and minds open.

tom,

1. A wittol is a guy who willingly shares his wife.
2. At least you are discussing stuff.
3. A for real guy will work with. Respect your limits. It sounds like you two are looking for a sexual surrogate for her. And maybe you want to be in the same room, or at least in the house, so you can she can share the intimacy she is getting from an other man.

best of luck
So few walk the walk!!
If I could have even 1 wife for every 100 dreamers, I would have a guy's wife every night!

yes number 3 exactly. So rare.

Good luck with what you decide. Keep us updated.

I suggest you take your time...perhaps place an ad in a swinger's site such as AFF looking for a handsome single male, and be very upfront about what type of relationship you are seeking...you can meet each contender in neutral grounds and see how things develop. You will probably go through several candidates before you hit upon Mr. Right for your wife. Once you have found him, and he has shown that he can satisfy her for you, the relationship can be further cultivated until all 3 of you are thoroughly comfortable with the arrangements.

As you said, it is rare relationship, but it is very possible with the right permister. You won't know until you try, and if at first you don't succeed, then try and try again. There is someone out there for everyone...it's just a matter of locating him. Good luck and do keep us advised on your progress!