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Now that she's started, I wonder how far she'll go....

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mred4682

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Posts: 265
#91
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LOL.... oh yes. Honestly I like it the way things are, but I do understand your comment about being overlooked. My issue is that I'm very small and my wife is not sensative, so she needs someone big feeling wise, but she has so far given me attention as well.

Its interesting when your wife point blank looks you in the eye when your inside her and tells you she wishes you were bigger, but then after a pause says thats ok, you will just need to keep letting me enjoy my boyfriends.

It sounds like your wife really loves you, she will still love you after she has someone else and I'm sure she will still want to show you that love. However make sure your relationship stays strong. In other words KEEP TALKING. She already knows she has other options. I find that that beauty of this lifestyle. It powers us to comunicate, there isn't another choice if we wish for our marriage to continue.

Have fun. I think you will enjoy taking the next step. The first time was the most powerful emotions I've ever experienced by far.
nooo

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Posts: 267
#92 · Edited by: nooo
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My wife and I really love each other and have been trying to make absolutely sure anything we do works for both of us. We'd be doomed if that weren't the case. Trust that we have talked this thing to death from the very first moment it became a possibilty. I have also been acutely aware that she now knows that with a moment's notice she can have a ton of men competing for her attention, I have to keep providing anything she wants and stay attentive to her needs. I have always been more quiet and find this is pulling me out of my shell more to make sure she is happy.

I love what you wrote about your wife requesting someone bigger. If it were anything else, you could try to give it her harder, or last longer... but when she wants someone larger, you have to let her find someone else. My wife told me she would like to feel someone thicker to really stretch her, that is something I'd love for her to experience.
nooo

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Posts: 267
#93 · Edited by: nooo
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Well... two differnet types of updates again today...

First, my wife has been having a good time with her favorite since this is a week that he is free to talk every night. He talked her into taping herself having an orgasm, so I took a video of her last night that she sent to him. Also, about three years ago, she shaved completely for me for a special occassion and we enjoyed it so much that she has stayed that way ever since. I love the smooth feel of her and it seems so clean and sexy this way. I like her this way so much that I have told her that I will give her oral any time she pleases. A day or two ago, her favorite said he'd like to see her with a landing strip, so she is beginning to let it grow in. It is a turn-on to see her make a physical change of something that intimate at the request of another man.

The other part caught me a little off-guard this morning. She's been talking more frequently with L, the single guy I mentioned two posts ago. He has been making a good impression on her and two nights ago she told me that she is beginning to feel a connection with him. She wasn't sure if she wanted to go further with things, but was starting to like him. This morning, we talked again and she said she thinks she would like to meet him after they get to know each other further. She said the combination of him being single and far enough away made it a better possibility than the others she has talked to. We both decided that meeting someone who is too close to here will only lead to problems - my wife getting too involved emotionally, me getting left out and jealous. The further distance between us and L will make it inconvenient to meet but if things work out, that could lead to more buildup between visits.

I hope people reading this are able to see the pictures ok... I had to resize them from the original. When I click on the links, they come in very large.
another one from last week's photo session
another one from last week's photo session
Just after her video session last night...
Just after her video session last night...
During the taping...
During the taping...
mred4682

Member

Posts: 265
#94
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Oh my...!!! love that second shot!

LOL... so a you guys are now thinking a little distance is a good idea? Seems someone was suggesting that to you awhile back..;)

Sounds like you guys are having a blast and are really in love. Glad to hear you guys talk about every detail. If you continue, there won't be any problem. I suspect your wife will back off from the guy after she does go all the way. She will feel a little guilty, but it won't take long before she is back at it again.

Love to read your posts.
nooo

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Posts: 267
#95 · Edited by: nooo
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Thursday night my wife stayed up late messaging L. In the morning, she told me that she was enjoying talking to him. A little while later, I sent her a text asking if they had discussed meeting in permister. She replied simply, "Yes, we discussed that after some more time we'd meet." Seeing a finality of her words (even knowing that this was not a done deal by any means really got to me. I tried to work for a few minutes unsuccessfully before going for a walk to clear my head and then call her with a few more questions.
That night, she talked to L for the first time on the phone - once for an hour then later for 1 1/2 hours. I only got bits of their conversation as she walked around the house.
Saturday morning (yesterday), we loaded up and headed three hours out of town for a family vacation. Thankfully, it was just the two of us in my truck and the time both flew by and stayed motionless as we discussed our future. While she said it was not definite that things with her and L would work out, it seemed as though they might. She told me that she had decided that she wanted a lover and hopefully things work out with L. I asked her about birth control as I am fixed but she is not. She said she'd been thinking of talking to her doctor about going on the pill or finding new options. She said she was waiting to see where things were headed but if she was sure that she was headed to a physical relationship she would resume birth control. That sat with me all day, especially the fact that she'd already been planning what she wanted to do. That made the probability of her taking a lover into reality for me, realizing that we weren't just playing with the fantasy anymore. I told my wife about a story I read on here where a wife was going on birth control to be with her lover and they had a little ceremony where the husband gave her the pill to make it official that he was consenting. There were even two pictures... I wish I could find that story to show her. Anyway, I was hard for her the entire day, but we didn't have time alone. Late at night, she was texting L and I was so pent up I thought I'd burst. I went to the bathroom and relieved myself and layed back down with her. Within minutes, I filled back up again and felt as though I hadn't had relief in weeks again.

Thankfully, we had a few minutes together this morning before we had to join the family. I thanked her and explained that I really needed to feel re-connected with her. I can't help but feel as though we are on a rollercoaster and are nealy at the top of the first hill. We are just about to cross that point of no return... there is one last landing to get off at the top, but the stairs look shaky and even if I needed to use this emergency exit, there may not be enough time left. Today I have been trying to keep this in perspective and realize we are still in a good place and we don't know what the future holds but either way, we'll enjoy ourselves.
Fortune2

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Posts: 5
#96
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If it worries you, then you should stop! If you can live with the results (good or bad), then have fun with it.

Or maybe you should try swinging rather then just her taking a lover?
orban victoria

Anonymous

#97
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In my marriage we started with the calendar method and I used condom on risky days. When my wife started to cheat me she changed to pill soon. By the way I'm let fuck her with condoms only.
monstrol

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Posts: 111
#98
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I think you would love PalTalk. You cam up and show what you like and watch others. Your wife and her friends could do more than just chat and you never have to leave your house. It isn't too expensive and she can have all kinds of sex with others and you can watch or join in.
169lover

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Posts: 270
#99
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Be careful, what you wish in fantasy may not work in reality.
Having had some experience with sharing a girl friend, we
didn't stay with one permister. It's to easy for ones wife or GF to develop feelings
for for one guy. Are you ready to give up sex with your wife?.
That being said good luck.
mred4682

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Posts: 265
#100
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Nooo: love the new shot you posted. My comment above was referring to my early posts to you about finding guys in your company. You mentioned a few posts ago that finding guys with a little distance was good, so I was just trying to tease you.

I COMPLETELY understand your feelings. These guys that are posting lately are trying to let you know that it is risky, as I know you understand. As I've told you before, my wife doesn't make too strong of a connection wit the guys she has sex with because she doesn't want to develop too many emotions for them. Girls to become conected sometimes. I think you guys will be fine as long as you both continue to talk and she keeps it in perspective as being just sex.
nooo

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#101
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Well, things have been moving along nicely and we've had some interesting developments. My wife and L have had plenty of time over the last few days to get to know each other. They have been talking online or texting whenever possible, and each evening, my wife and I take a walk and she has a nice phone conversation with him. They are hitting it off nicely and it seems like this will be a good match. He has been very good about including me in their talks and we've exchanged a few email getting to know each other a little bit. It seems like this is the best possible situation for us, someone who is available to meet occassionally but not too frequently. It sounds like we will be able to find a nice balance of their time along and things that include all three of us. In some ways, I wish we could go the way mred suggested with a more casual friend with her to hook up with, but that is not her nature at all. We've talked quite a bit and we are convinced that she will be able to hold relationships with both of us in a way that pleases everyone. It sounds as though they both would like to take things slowly, meeting in permister for dinner after more time has passed to see if there is as good a connection in permister as there is remotely.

One request I made of her this morning should help the success of our transition... I asked that if she would like to go through with this, she begin cutting ties with the other guys she chats with so she can focus her attention on L and the life she and I have together. Most of the people she speaks to come and go and she tends to get too caught up in keeping in touch or not being able to resist when they text. She's been keeping her IM profile marked as away and turned her AM profile invisible and that has helped. She agreed that she will try to find a healthy balance for us.
3454

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Posts: 50
#102
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be carefull with her focusing on jus one nooo. Lot's of people warn against exacttly that & I'd echo it 100%. My wife has left me after we had a great set up with a regular FB. She still loves me I know but cos she's seen so much of him for so long in so many exciting fantasy land situations she's convinced herself that she should be with him & moved out.

Looking back it's DEFINATELY happened because she focused purely on 1. Be VERY careful with this. I was convinced we were strong enough & she was too but over time I promise you it's a recipes for disaster. I've done a fair bit of research on this since my break up & it's very common in these relationships.

Good luck, & think about VERY carefully
169lover

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Posts: 270
#103
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3454
3454 is right about one guy. It is easy to become caught in a fantasy.
Sex overcomes reality. In great bed , in real life a real asshole.
Been there. Good luck
orban victoria

Anonymous

#104
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Does Kati still lives with her fuckbuddy? Bad to hear that...
nooo

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#105
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So am I to assume that mred is one of the only people that this has worked out positively for?
orban victoria

Anonymous

#106 · Edited by: orban victoria
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Be careful!
mred4682

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Posts: 265
#107
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I think they are refering to your wife having only one guy and your wife having an emotional conection as well with him. Like I've mentioned to you before, my wife avoids emotional connections so she doesn't become confussed.

I think it can work for you guys as long as you guys keep talking, but if your wife isn't able to separate sex from emotion, it does become riskier which is what these other guys are trying to warn you about. Even more so if it's just one other guy. I recognize that this is your first time and it will take a lot for you guys, but I would suggest. Everyone knowing that after they have sex they won't talk for several weeks. After all it is about your guys relationship.

I think there are a LOT of couples that are living a positve cuckold lifestyle in one form or another. Each couple has to figure out what works for them.
wifedateshubwaits

Anonymous

#108
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I can also vouch for the suggestions to include more than one guy.

When my wife and I first started in this lifestyle, she had a torrid relationship with another man. All during this time I was on cloud nine as I loved hearing about their get togethers and I encouraged her to see him frequently. My excitement at her infidelity caused me to overlook their obvious attachment and it was only after she spent a long weekend with him without a single call home that I became concerned.

Fortunately, my wife and I have always been close and I was able to convince her to break it off with him. It took some doing on her part (with only one transgression) but she was able to let him go. There were tears and I found myself in the unusual postion to consoling my wife over her break up with another man.

After this my wife became very promiscuous and I must admit I encouraged her behavior. Over the course of the following year she fucked many different men and learned to seperate sex from emotion. Although there were times where I tired of the weekend nights home alone, I felt like this was a learning experience for us both. Since then, she has calmed down considerably but always has several fuck buddies that she can contact when she is in the mood.

This was all over ten years ago, so yes it can work and in our case is working great!
mred4682

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#109
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Nooo

Please don't stop posting because people are suggesting things you don't necessarily agree with. We all still want to know how things are going, good bad or otherwise. Like I keep saying every relationship is different, so no one can tell you guys how to live yours. I miss your updates.
nooo

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Posts: 267
#110 · Edited by: nooo
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My lack of updates was more about a lack of time than anything else...

Well, things have taken a few steps forward. We have agreed to meet with L sometime in the next couple of weeks. We talked about a date two weeks from now, meeting for lunch to get to know each other and then they would have time alone. My wife has said that the first meeting would have some intimacy but she wanted to take things slowly... we'll see. We talked a few details out already, such as limiting visits to once a month and making sure she and I have time together after their first few times together. We'll have to find some free time between now and her first date, I want to help her find something sexy and new to wear.
seiko611

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#111
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Glad to hear you're still around - very sexy situation you have!
mred4682

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Posts: 265
#112
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Nice. Sounds like you guys are aproaching it reamisterably. Your both going to love it.
nooo

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Posts: 267
#113 · Edited by: nooo
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After my hasty update last night, my wife and I had some much needed quiet time to reflect on our present and future. We are tentatively planning on meeting L at a resort town that is between our locations two weeks from tomorrow and getting two rooms for the night. The exact plans haven't yet been worked out, but we were thinking about the three of us meeting for lunch, then my wife and L having the afternoon to talk and get to know each other. Then my wife and I could reunite before dinner and she could get dressed up for their dinner alone. We have been shopping online and if she picks any of the dresses we've been looking at, she will be stunning. During their dinner and evening together, I will find something to do to pass the time (that will not be easy, I'm sure). Then my wife and I can return to our room for the night. She plans on seeing him the next morning before we head home. At this point, she has said there will certainly be some type of intimacy but she doesn't know how far she will want to go on a first date. I will be very surprised if things don't get farther than they plan, based on the buildup and having all day together.
After we talked, she began giving me an expert hand release as we talked about their first time together. She asked if I wanted to hear the truth of what she expected or what would make me finish quicker. I said both, in that order. She told me how she she was looking forward to seeing him in permister and seeing how they reacted together but that it would probably take a bit of time to get comfortable together. Following that, she began a torrid description of what she'd like to do and slowly built me towards one of the most complete releases I've felt. After cleaning up and a few more quiet minutes together, she went outside to talk to L on the phone, presumably about their plans. As I laid there feeling fully drained, I was surprised at how rapidly I filled up a second time just thinking about all she had told me.

Two weeks.... in some ways I want every minute from now until then to stretch forever and in others I want to be there now.
mred4682

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#114
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hum.... I hope it works out the way you expect. I always find it interesting that if it's just sex that women need to become "intimate" in other ways. Why does she leave the room to go talk to L if she is telling you everything anyway? I can kind of understand getting to know each other in permister, but sounds like a lot of secrecy to me. Sorry if this isn't what you want to hear, I just hope your guys relationship stays strong.

Good luck, the one and only time I wasn't there drove me nuts, being turned on and extreamly jealous. If thats what your looking for, you wont be disappointed, but its so much more when it really happens.
nooo

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#115
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Well, we are slowly nearing my wife's first date. We were wrong about when it will be, it will be two weeks from this Saturday. When we were on vacation a few weeks ago, she bought a bottle of wine for L.... it has been sitting on our wine rack in the kitchen as a reminder that she will be seeing him in permister. Just a few days ago, our hotel reservations came in the mail. We are staying in a old historic inn, and seeing the reservations in hand made this real again. For a while, the date was several weeks in the future so it was easy to not necesarily see it as something that is going to happen. Today, she got the dress she will wear to dinner in the mail. I look forward to seeing how it looks on her... the next time I see it will probably be as she is leaving for her dinner and evening with L.
Fortune

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#116
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It sounds like it's going to be great! Maybe she should try to pick up someone to 'take the edge off'? Not relax around, just suggesting a friendly conversation with a stranger at a bar or something like that.
nooo

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#117
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Our plans are coming along nicely and the date is rapidly approaching. My wife has been talking to L on the phone at least daily and they've been discussing the plans of what they'd like to do with their time. It sounds like after our lunch together, they will walk around the shops of the historic area where we are staying and get to know each other in permister. Just before dinner, she and I are going to meet in our room so she can fill me in about how things are going and for her to get dresed for her dinner date. As I mentioned before, the little black dress she picked out is here and it will look stunning on her. They have dinner reservations at an elegant restaurant near his hotel. She has a bottle of wine saved for when they go to his room after dinner. She also picked out some very sexy lingerie, she said if things felt right by that point, she would excuse herself to change into it. After their time together, she is going to meet me back in our room where I will be anxiously awaiting her return. We have not discussed the details yet, but she is planning on meeting up with him again the following morning before he heads home.

How far things progress between then will depend on how comfortable she feels with the situation, but she said if it goes well, she doesn't have any limits on what she would do. It has been on my mind continuously that in just 11 days, my wife may take a lover for the first time.
mred4682

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#118
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I hope you don't have a weak heart, because the waiting is going to make your heart want to pound out of your chest, your mind will be imagining everything and you will range from extreme turn on to depression. It is really an experience. Almost overwhelming, but make sure your in a possitive space when she returns and things should be fine. It's literally going to rock your world. Enjoy it.
drpool

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#119
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mred4682, you have described the feeling perfectly. My wife had a night with a lover a couple of weeks ago which was our first experience. She stayed overnight with him in a hotel and I tell you, that was one of the hardest nights I have had to get through. My heart was racing, stomach churning, couldn't relax. I went and picked her up the next morning - she had an enjoyable evening and wants to do it again. I've taken a little bit longer to come to terms with it actually happening rather than just being fantasy (I was the instigator of it all in the first place), but now I am cool about it, and our relationship is better than it was before. We have been married 18 years and together for 25 so we had a pretty solid relationship beforehand anyway.
This is the first time I have actually posted after that night, but thought that your situation nooo is unfolding very similar to ours. I too, went through the emotional swing of wanting and not wanting it to happen so badly, but now it's happened, we are very cool. As mred4682 says, it will rock your world. Make sure you communicate, that's such a huge thing to making it work.
nooo

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Posts: 267
#120 · Edited by: nooo 
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I am certain that I will have an abundance of all of the emotions you two have described quite well... noon tomorrow will be one week until my wife meets L for the first time and I have been experiencing varying degrees of excitement, fear, regret, and arousal. Mostly, I am looking forward to seeing how all of this works out. I know that the wait will be agonizing. I am not good at being patient normally, and not knowing what is going on will kick my already active imagination into overdrive.

I can certainly relate to your statement about the difficulty of going from fantasy to reality. For as long as I can remember, the thought of my wife with another guy was the most powerful trigger I could imagine, but as we took steps towards actually doing it, I had to do a lot of soul searching to determine if the reality would be as pleasurable. One thing I hadn't predicted was the fact that things wouldn't go exactly as I had pictured, since it would be affected by not only my wife's desires but also those of the other man. I think we've done a great job in the planning of our upcoming weekend to make sure that we will have a good balance for all of us.

Tonight, my wife brought up something I expected we'd talk about soon... she asked what I thought about us taking a short break physically before her first date. Initially, she asked about taking a week off but we decided that five days would be more practical. I can feel the anticipation of our last time together, knowing that the next time someone is inside her, it might not be me. We have set aside time to be alone between their afternoon of walking and shopping and their dinner date. I am really looking forward to helping her get ready and seeing how stunning she will appear when she meets him for their evening. I know I will have a mixture of pride and jealousy seeing her leave with him.
Is that a great butt or what?
Is that a great butt or what?
Love her curves...
Love her curves...
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Now that she's started, I wonder how far she'll go....
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