She is my goddess

Some of you husbands don't get it
It's not about what you want, now is it???
Your wife shouldn't be doing ANYTHING for you, otherwise you still have control. Giving up control to your wife is the most beautiful, loving, freeing, exciting thing in the whole world, and if she decides to take a real man as a lover because your complete presentation makes you incapable of satisfying her like a real man, then all the better!---BUT ONLY IF IT'S WHAT SHE WANTS!!!

When my wife cuckolds me, she's not acting out a role, she's loving me the way I am.
I don't have to be a manly man, in control and aggressive, I can be me and she loves me still... or maybe because...
She is my goddess.
I've been worshipping her, from afar and up close, for 17 years.
I've just recently become her complete slave...
My wife had a boyfriend for 8 months. It was a difficult time for me as I was still wrestling with my submissive nature. I was still trying to exert control over the situation and I made it a little hard for my wife back then. I expected to be able to fuck her when she got home from his house and I would badger her to tell me everything that happened. When she came home from seeing him she was usually very tired and it was late, so I complicated the arrangement too much for her. She stopped seeing him and we had a lot of problems between the two of us. It was my fault- I was never honest with her or myself about what was happening and who I was.
I now realize that my desires are not what matters, rather the only thing that matters is her happiness and fullfilment. Now that she owns me and knows how much I truly worship her, I have finally become my true self.
If she were to take a lover now I would be gloriously happy, but not for the reamisters many husbands would love it. (Many husbands want thier wife to have sex with another man in front of them. They are still controlling thier wife through these demands. I would love to be able to see my wife making love to her lover- but not if it will effect hers, or her lover's, enjoyment. I would be happy just knowing she was loving another man) I would be finally fulfilling my love for her and my place as her slave. I am not worthy of even having her touch my little dick, let alone putting it inside of her. She loves me, but that doesnt mean she should have to spend the rest of her life dealing with the sexual peccadillos of a truly submissive man. She should be able to enjoy what a real man can do for her, while at the same time be in a very loving, caring marriage. I am physically unable to honestly make love to her without experiencing a lot of pain due to some medical problems. I have been very nervous about telling her this because I am afraid of what she may think about it. Why should she be resigned to getting less and less love-making as my physical condition continues to make it uncomfortable and unfulfilling for her?
I believe that she would not be committing adultery if she were to take a lover for herself. Adultery is defined as "Voluntary sexual intercourse with someone other than the lawful spouse"- but this definition is based on the commonly held ideas about what a wife and husband should be like in thier relationship. I cannot be what a traditional husband is supposed to be. I cannot comfortably even act out the part- as that would be a lie. The reamister adultery is proscribed is that it breaks up families and causes so much pain for everyone involved. If my wife were to have a boyfriend there would be no danger of it breaking up our marriage. In fact... it would make our marriage much, much stronger!
It just seems unfair and wrong that because my wife loves me she should be stuck with the frustration and troubles caused by my inability to be manly and uncomplicated sexually. Over time she would eventually become disatisfied with me and my wierdness- eventually it would drain the love right out of our relationship and she would be powerd to leave me so that she can have happiness. It CANT be a wrong thing to do if it's simply an expression of our love for each other and it makes it possible for us to stay together and truly in love for the rest of our lives.

I know that in her heart of hearts she would prefer I be a real man and not have all of these sexual hang-ups. She has told me that I complicate things WAY too much and that she wishes we could just make love like a normal couple- but I can't... I wish I could be that man for her, but I can't. I never have been that man and all the times in my past when it seemed I was that man, it was an act. My true self is one of NEEDING to serve her. My true self is uncomfortable "fucking" my woman like normal men would- And I'm done with acting like I'm someone I'm supposed to be, instead of who I really am. The act of intercourse for me is troubling because I feel like it brings an aggressive side out of me that I really, truly despise. I am much more fulfilled and honest with myself when I'm washing her hair or rubbing her legs. I make love to my wife with my mouth, and it is the only thing that feels right to me. I cannot demand anything from her when I am only giving her pleasure with my mouth, and the rest of the universe disapears when I have no demands for myself. Her pleasure becomes my ultimate pleasure.

I am safe with her now. I am ME with her now.
I am loved- not for what I can do for her- but simply because I am.
All the masks and defenses are down now. My innermost, true self can be exposed to her and she won't turn her back on me. She won't stop loving me because our love isn't based on what or how we are- just that we are.
I have never been accepted for who I am by anyone in this world, until now...
My wife, my love, my goddess has given me permission to be who I am and I feel so much freedom and joy.
I hope she understands why I feel the way I do about her. It's OK if she doesnt though- it's enough that she accepts me and my worship of her for what it really is; The true me finally free to express my complete joy and devotion and love for her.
When I watch her with her lover I cry sometimes- not because it hurts to see her with another man- but because it is the most beautiful sight in the world to me to see her honestly enjoying herself in another man's arms. Her gasps of pleasure and the intensity of thier love-making makes my total presentation to her complete. When she is in his arms I am layed bare to her. When she admits to herself and to me (and him) that she prefers making love to him over me I am in my true place. I am.
I am.
I am.
I am.- but only because my goddess has made it possible.

I hope to be deserving of this gift from my wife for all the rest of the days of my life.
I love her, totally, truly and forever.

beautifull