Email from my wife - Advice needed!

There is nothing I want more than to fully and completely own you...

I fantasize about you worshiping me completely, my body, my mind, my soul.

[...]

I want to feel your complete respect, admiration and adoration. I don't want to dominate you. I want you to simply want to be mine, without the slightest bit of effort on my part.

I want to feel that I can do anything, say anything, and it won't affect how you feel about me, how much you want me. I want to own you in such a powerful way that you feel you are free but would never choose to be without me. To me that is the most powerful way of owning someone. And that's the way I want you.

[...]

I love fucking other men. To show you that so many other men want me and if you don't treat me like you should, I'll find myself a more deserving man.

I love that you make love to me in different ways. I love that sometimes you are rough and sometimes you are gentle. Ultimately, I want to feel like I turn you on so much, that my pleasure gives you so much pleasure, that no matter how we make love, it's always beautiful.

I know I'm not good at training you because I'm too soft. I don't make you do the things I want often enough. That's why you misbehaved that time when you were licking me. I need to get better at punishing you, so you become the man I want all the time. I want my feet licked more often. I want you to caress my hair just the way I like it when we're watching TV. I want you to kiss me more often. I want you to talk to me more openly and proactively about your feelings. I want you to never again hide anything from me. And I want you to do these and all other things I like without my having to 'make' you do it, without my having to say a word even. I don't like dominating by power. I want you to be so mine that you anticipate my every need and desire, before even I know I have them. That's the mark of a true slave. And I need to train you to become the type of slave I want. I know you need and want to be trained. I just need to figure out how to do it so that I enjoy the process. Perhaps you should do some research on training methods so I can choose one...? Hmm, let me restate that. I order you to research training methods for me to achieve what I want with you, three methods before you come home, so I can pick one to apply on you. You should also buy a chastity belt for yourself, I want to see if I'd like to have you in one.

How do you feel about the type of commitment I want from you? Are you willing to be the kind of slave I want? It's much harder than just being the kind that simply follows orders... Are you willing to learn how to anticipate my every wish? Will it make you happy? I feel that you have gotten better at this over time. But there is still a long way to go. I need to know that you are truly willing to work on it...

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Any advice on good training methods and resources for female-led relationships and/or male chastity that don`t involve domination by power or physical pain?

it_ccm74
please do not post the same topic to the multiple sub-forums

thank you,
mbc

Well, what are you waiting for? You should reply to her with a YES! Sounds like she wants a loving cuckold relationship with her in charge. But not in the extremes that many women are opposed to.

Love her, trust her, and give her all the support she needs to cuckold you.

Good luck, and keep us up to date as things go.

Wow, great start to a thread! Elise Sutton might help as well as many other web sites. Please keep us posted.

MrBigCuckold
Ok, sorry!

I guess if I have to be a slave I would want to be a slave to a woman like that, who can express her feelings in such a profound sense. Sounds as though you got yourself a keeper. Hope you get to the point that she wants you at, and that you make each other (and her bulls) very happy.

I agree with others comments. She sounds insightful and aware. She is asking you to commit to her. What is the problem ? Unless you don't want to do that.

I like her

Thank you all for your replies.

There is no doubt I want to be hers, I was just asking practical advises to help her in my training.
At the end I bought a book for her "How to set up an FLR" by Georgia Ivey Green, quite good for an introduction on this lifestyle. She also read another, more extreme one: "Owning & Traing a Male Slave" by Ingrid Bellemare.

I think she will use both books to find her own style at being in charge.

In reality the cuckolding part of our lifestyle is already well under way. We started as a swinging couple going to parties to meet other couples. Then at those parties she started hooking up with single guys (mostly black) that then started seeing also outside the parties, alone. After that she started finding guys also during normal activities like dance classes, gym, clubs and so we stopped going to swing parties.
At that point she decided she wanted a half-open relationship, where she could fuck around while I stayed faithful to her.

Of course I agreed and she took good advantage of the situation, having two regular lovers plus the occasional one-night-stand while on biz trip.

The problem was that my submissiveness is too dependent on her fucking around and not enough on just her authority (after she come back from a good fucking I am as docile as a little puppy) so she is looking for a training technique that could make me obey her unconditionally regardless of anything else.
That's why she is toying with the idea of putting me in chastity cage.
I am both excited by the idea but also worried on how it would be to lose access to my cock!

Any experience from other would be appreciated!

I think she's a little lazy, wants all the benefits of a slave but doesn't want to put any effort in. Doesn't want to dominate you, doesn't want to train you !! Sounds like a one way street.

Her email reads like the perfect FLR manifesto! She is carrying out her own agenda openly and has you on a tight leash. It seems like the lady has things under control. She is getting hers! You enjoy letting her wipe her extra marital fun off with your ego. Thats the whole idea! The only one bitching is you.

The real problem here is that she had to even write that email in the first place! You are trying to top from the bottom and her letter clearly points out your many errors. She can have fun but she pays dearly because you only behave properly when she does YOUR will! You are failing to allow her to wear the pants one hundred percent of the time by not being sincerely submissive to her will. Now that she spelled it out for you so well, you still are being obtuse and want an interpreter to come up for a plan for her to rule you. It don't work that way. You will have to fulfill every request in her email on your own. She has spoken and you must obey all of her directions without the slightest aggravation for her! If you refuse to anticipate and fully submit to her wishes at all times it can never work. So far the only thing you are doing is trying to be cute and wishy-washy about the whole FLR thing and her email shows how far off that mark you really are. Do you want her total rule over all aspects of the relationship or not? You must radically change your tune if you do!

Thing she needs to do now is to break you. She can be lazy as she wants and still very easily bring you to heel. It goes like this; You explain to her your need for her to break your spirit and attitude in order to train you to obey her will. Ask her to take your toy away (put your prick in a cage) so it can't distract you from learning how to fit under her thumb.

She is being a perfect Bitch and rubbing it in your face real good. She isn't malicious and don't want to be the bad guy here. So if you want more you'll need to beg her to lock your manhood away and plead with her to be a real Cunt in keeping it locked away. She probaly realizes that now. If she agrees then ask her permission to allow you to cage and lock your dick and give her the key. Now it is fun time for her. She can wear sexy outfits and show sexy looks while constantly reminding you that you won't be getting any more of her goodies. Every time someone hot passes by or comes on TV she can remind you that you'll get no more of any female pleasure. If she will be a real Cunt for you, you will break in short time. Once she has broken you she will lose her respect for your manhood. Done properly, you will become unworthy of her sex and she'll probaly not give you so much as a glimpse of her panties ever again. Sexual respect from her toward your maleness is irretrievable at that point. Her goodies are reserved for other men only!

Remember that the only way it can work is for you to get down on your knees and beg for her strict rule. She must know that you absolutely need her to have total chastity control over you before you can or will reward her by behaving properly!

You will cry, beg and do any other thing she wants to get your relief. This is a great, fun experience for her! You will bare your soul to her and she will get great pleasure fucking with your head. It can last for days and days and when she is done fucking up your sexuality for good she might then give you permission to unlock your cock. Of course she will tell you that she would rather have you keep yourself locked for her anyway and you'll be a pussy and quickly agree! Then she gives you the key, and you unlock the cage and immediately replace it with a numbered plastic tape lock.

She is officially Boss, you officially Bitch and your self-caged sex locked with a plastic tape is testimony that she is not a cruel permister and that you are very eager to learn the most important thing! Her authority is wherever she decides to put her thumb and your duty is to adjust your life so that it always remains under her thumb!

Something like that is one way it may work. If you want to be her slave, you are expected to do all of the work while she enjoys all of the play!

You can't top from the bottom. If you want to be her bitch then its got to be all the way her bitch. Your call.
..............PSEUDO PERSON...YMMV!

It_CCM you have to make a decision,give in totally or give up,if she is like me having tasted control doubt if she will take a backward move..It will take awhile to adjust to a chastity device but you can do it ..Just watch out for chaffing points..If you are a true submissive you will be happy if your not then stop it..

it_ccm, listen to Linda. This woman has years of experience with cuckolding her husband, she's a fuckin' expert! Good tip though, using a good cream to reduce the chance of chaffing, and hygene, keep the damn thing clean! Once you're locked away, you'll thank your wife for taking control of your pathetic sex life.