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waystar
Member
16
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# Posted: 25 Mar 2008 17:00:48
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Hello All, I'm new here but my subhub is a faithful reader. I/we had our first cuckold experience this past weekend and I need some advice on handling my husband's feelings. Our history is, we've been married for almost 20 years and he's been begging me to cuckold him for about 4 years. We've seriously discussed it for the past year and pretty much talked it to death. We've gone over it in our minds so many times that it was driving both of us crazy. His best friend knows all about our private life of FemDom and his secret desire to be cuckolded. His friend actually volunteered to have sex with me and I graciously accepted. I never thought in a million years he would do it. He is VERY married, not getting any sex at home but has always been faithful to his wife. Well, we got together and talked very openly about our desires and my husband's friend agreed to everyhting, including letting my hubby watch. It was incredible. I couldn't believe how hot it was. At one point during an orgasm, I called his friend's name out and my subhub got really jeleous. Another time he heard me tell his friend that NO ONE has ever made me feel that great before. I think I had 30 orgasms in 2 hours, and we never had intercourse. The last 20 minutes, I completely forgot about my husband and was enjoying myself, like he wanted me to. The rest of the time there was eye contact or conversation between us. He assured me he was fine. It was a wonderful first experience and I wouldn't have wanted it to be with anyone else but his best friend, who truly loves my husband like a brother. My question is this...my husband got so jeleous and then ended up crying becasue he was in so much pain. During his tears, his cock remained hard as a rock. I think this is the beginning of the breaking of his male ego but I'm not sure. He is all about wanting to feel humiliated and he was. He is completely masochistic. All about pain and pleasure. Has anyone else felt feelings of hurt etc... after the first time? We are deeply in love and I assure him that he is the only one for me, forever. He's actually a gorgeous guy and has a body builder's physique. He is very hot! It's rare to find another guy who I find more attractive than my husband. I love the idea of continuing to cuckold him with his best friend and actually fuck but I want to make sure I am not damaging hubby in a bad way. Thanks!
My wifes scheduale
MistressPlanet.com
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Sa Tyr
Member
61
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# Posted: 25 Mar 2008 18:01:10
Reply
Make it feel to him that you are both doing this for the sake of both of you and that the other guy is simply an extra, a prop, to your own little game of sexy fun. Say you love him extra extra for trusting you to keep the feelings you have for him and that the other guy to you was no more than a big hot fleshy dildo. It is the emotional betrayal that is difficult for him to handle. I am writing this irrespective of whether your posting is genuine or not but it may be of sme use to anyone reading it: it is based on personal experiences of my highly sexed partner and my highly voyeuristic nature.
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waystar
Member
16
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# Posted: 25 Mar 2008 21:14:09
Reply
Thanks for your reply. That's exactly what I thought and did and I have been spending lots of time reassuring my hubby that's all his friend is, a big dildo and the real hot part is what goes on between hubby and I. He is much better now and is looking forward to the next time. I appreciate your help.
I'm a little puzzled why you might think this posting was not genuine. Was it something I said?
My wifes scheduale
MistressPlanet.com
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draclif69
Member
1433
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# Posted: 26 Mar 2008 18:07:26 · Edited by: draclif69
Reply
I agree with Sa Tyr's comments. The emotional rollercoaster is what this fantasy is all about. I've read dozens of posts that transition from fantasy to reality is hard. I have my own perspective on why that is...it's a loss of control combined with change. Both are hard for anyone to manage through and taking them at the same time is powerful. You have been his safe and trusted 'home' for 20 years. You have routine. You have mutual understanding. You have set expectations. Now all of those are being challenged. It's not surprising that he reacted the way he did. I see Sa Tyr's comments are being neutralizing in nature - your enjoyment from another guys comes from experiencing something new as much as it does the pure pleasure we get from sex. Neutralize its effect on you in your own eyes and in your husband’s eyes by reducing it to a shared prop. It's not an emotional thing - it's a physical thing. Reduce it.
Compartmentalize it into pieces and give him control over some (but not all) of the pieces. While my wife and I have never engaged another man, we've agreed that if we do any hint of emotion attached to her relationship with him will need to mean an end to the relationship (or at least a change). That gives me some control over the situation and humans need to be able to control. Loss of control is one of the scariest things for us.
Also, while you're doing those things - do everything you can to make it fun for your husband and not so serious. The more "serious" it is as an event in your lives, the more importance you give it. It's entertainment you two share, nothing more. Which is more serious, paying bills on time or going to a movie? Get your priorities in line...entertainment comes second and is an option. It's not as important. It's not as serious. It's not a commitment (even though part of the fantasy is to make it seem like it is, don't let it (right now)).
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waystar
Member
16
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# Posted: 27 Mar 2008 17:25:31
Reply
Thanks draclif69. I appreciate the kind words. I totally agree with your perspective about the whole loss of control aspect along with big change.
I've had time to evaluate my thoughts and I'm ahppy to say it was just sex, mixed in with the whole "new and naughty" angle, then the whole power trip that came along with the intense humiliation of my husband by making him watch. I think I made a huge mistake though. After his friend left, hubby and I talked about it, both in shock and didn't take it any further. Next time, I will send lover boy on his way and then start the intense humiliation activities with hubby. I look at it as sex with his friend is just forplay for hubby and I. Like you said, his friend is just a prop. The best part is that we've know eachother so well for so long that there is absolutely no chance for any kind of romantic feelings. We're not going to get together and have a relationship. We both love our spouses and have families. There is no attration in real life. I plan on getting together again this week so I'll keep you posted. Hubby is hot at the thought. Any more advice, please share before hand. Thanks!
My wifes scheduale
MistressPlanet.com
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I_A_S_P
Member
50
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# Posted: 27 Mar 2008 22:57:15 · Edited by: I_A_S_P
Reply
"His friend is just a prop". It may be possible a guy not getting any in a while who just poked that hottie in your pix, with a promise yet, might increasingly feel himself to be more than a prop.
Exit strategy. Sunny now? Remember to bring your umbrella!
Third time's the charm. The fourth time with a couple begins to construe an entitlement to them.
Female Supremacy and Elise Sutton are sissy war cries and quoting them is rare with females. Hurts genuine cred when used on a board overly rampant with sissies.
If your other posts and photos are true, I infer that you are totally fatigued with wimps. I also humbly believe you seek a dominant male, not afraid to wear the pants and doesn't hide behind a skirt. You'll melt fast!
Submissive bull? Isn't that an ox? Oxymoron?
Creampies!
The ultimate masochistic submission for hubby is seeing that look in her eyes and face as she enjoys easing her lover's mess onto his mouth for the creamy cleanup!
Her's is having the pleasurable experience of her lovers tryst's ardor being tidied up by a sub hub begging her to rub it in his face! Total dominance!
..............PSEUDO PERSON
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waystar
Member
16
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# Posted: 1 Apr 2008 03:26:50
Reply
<Submissive bull? Isn't that an ox? Oxymoron?>
Absolutely not! However what 'is' Oxymoronic is for a FEmale Dominant that is a FEmale Supremist who rules over men in her life only to become a submissive to a Bull during sex?? Not in my lifetime!! His cock is for her pleasure only, not his.
True natural FEmale Dominance.
I simply cannot process the concept of a WOmen who dominates her husband/BF and then allows herself to be treated as a submissive by a Bull. Not to disrespect any one who enjoys this type of activity. To each their own. Just not my cup of tea.
And even to the submissive husband. I would not want to ‘even think’ what my husband would do to a bull if the bull were to be dominant over him. There would be no need for an ambulance, just the coroner’s office Not all cuckolds are sissies. (meaning weak and frail)
He is submissive only to me, no other. Perhaps you’re confused -as you speak of the characteristics of a female switch or female submissive, both which I am not.
Thanks for your post.
My wifes scheduale
MistressPlanet.com
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oldcuck
Member
39
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# Posted: 1 Apr 2008 18:26:04
Reply
Waystar,
your are correct, Mistress. i was married for 18yrs and cucked for a large portion of that time. my wife/Mistress took control of our lives from the very beginning. we were married at the courthouse by a judge and then She, i and 9 members of her family went on a mini honeymoon for a long weekend. during our marriage i was aware of dozens of men that she fucked, including her ex husband, and i'm fairly sure there were others that i didnot know about. but my point is the same as yours, in that she not only dominated me, she was in control of the other men in her life as well and the sex was for her pleasure not theirs. and as with all rules, there is always an exception or two even with her. i remember one man that took the control away from her, but true to her nature she on fucked him twice then took control back with her next lover.
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Hot4uBull
Member
130
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# Posted: 1 Apr 2008 22:22:34
Reply
I was writting you and lost my connection... I'll try again later. but the short story is go for it....
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mred4682
Member
77
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# Posted: 3 Apr 2008 08:55:34
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Waystar,
I responded EXACTLY the same way the first time my wife had sex with someone else. For me the other guy was worlds better than I EVER could dream of being. I still knew my wife loved me, but I thought there would be no way for her to be happy with me after what she had experienced. Real life is MUCH more intense than fantasy. My wife has now been with many guys and I still get the extream feeling after each time. I don't cry anymore but it is intense, but ultimately after she shows me she still loves me I absolutely Love it.
For me I need my wife to show her appriciation and Love as much as possible the few days after. Remember once he cums a couple times the entire thing goes from sexual to emotional for him. Just respect one another and talk talk talk. He will be ok. You'll love the life. Have fun.
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waystar
Member
16
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# Posted: 3 Apr 2008 18:49:28
Reply
Who were you referring to when you said "Remember once he cums a couple times the entire thing goes from sexual to emotional for him."
What exactly do you mean by that--- what is your experience?
Thanks!
My wifes scheduale
MistressPlanet.com
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orban victoria
Member
2
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# Posted: 4 Apr 2008 07:44:55
Reply
So... did anything happen last weekend?
justitiae
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mred4682
Member
77
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# Posted: 5 Apr 2008 09:14:08
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I'm talking about your husband. At least for me up until I cum, everything turns me on. Then afterwards I start taking things at more of an emotional level as appose to sexual. You really need to be able to distinguish the two. What your husband probably has trouble dealling with is the emotional atachment he feels you would have no choice but to have with his friend now that you experienced what you did.
You need to let him know, He is your husband and you will ALWAYS be with him. No one else, for life. Then letting him know sexually his friend is better, he can handle it, and the jealousy turns him on. They always talk about the peter meter on these sights meaning if his cock is hard, things are probably ok, and I would agree with that. You said he was still hard aftward and that is good. Talk to him honestly and everything will be fine.
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waystar
Member
16
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# Posted: 9 Apr 2008 05:27:03
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<What your husband probably has trouble dealing with is the emotional attachment he feels you would have no choice but to have with his friend now that you experienced what you did.>
Well to be honest I have zero feelings of an emotional attachment to this person. My husband speculates that it’s due to the fact I have never fucked him. He thinks that once this happens it creates an intimacy of a deeper level, which will develop an emotional attachment at some level. I disagree.
<You need to let him know, He is your husband and you will ALWAYS be with him. No one else, for life. Then letting him know sexually his friend is better, he can handle it>
He doesn’t have a problem with the whole event so far since no intercourse was involved. He is getting cold feet because he is worried that once I do fuck him and he does turn out to be a better lover than he is then it will be something he needs to live with for the 'rest' of his life. He says in the fantasy realm it’s enticing and very much a turn on... In the moment, but the reality is that he will need to live with the fact that he is an inadequate lover every time he looks at me. One side of him wanted this from the beginning of time, the other is so afraid. My dilemma.
My wifes scheduale
MistressPlanet.com
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mred4682
Member
77
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# Posted: 11 Apr 2008 03:16:47
Reply
Yes, if he wants to continue with it, he will indeed have to face the fact the other guy is better. I know that oh so well. It is indeed a MAJOR impact on you emotionally. If he has already realized it, it will only be more intense afterward, but let him know he has to figure out what he wants. Its not fair to you if he just takes you to the point and backs out. I did that once to, and it hurt my wife. I suggest the two of you talk completely open about all this and decide together. Once again it is very powerful.
Take JR advise and tease the hell out of him. Fantasize with him and be open in saying you loved that is friend was better. Then see how he reacts, and afterward talk about it.
This lifestyle can be wonderful as long as you keep talking to one another. Good luck I hope things work out either way.
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waystar
Member
16
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# Posted: 14 Apr 2008 03:11:25
Reply
Its not fair to you if he just takes you to the point and backs out.
well...he's at that point and he's backing out. After bugging me about it daily for 4 years. He's been on an emotional rollercoaster since the night it happened. It's very draining.
My wifes scheduale
MistressPlanet.com
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mred4682
Member
77
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# Posted: 15 Apr 2008 08:37:27
Reply
hum.... I'm sorry. You two need to have a serious talk. I meant it when I said that isn't fair. My first few times were very emotional, but once I commited I didn't back out. He needs to decide what he wants. The problem your running into is that it is like a rollercoaster at times emotionally. For me it is simply how turned on I am. If I'm turned on then I can handle all of it. If not, I have trouble with my wife even flirting a little. She has pretty much learned to read me, but she gets frustrated at times as well.
Once again it will be more intense when and if you go all the way. You cant take that back. If he has been pushing daily for 4 years, maybe you need to ask him and then go for it, but it will be hugely emotional for him. I got through it and found my place. Havn't read about that many others that admit to it being that emotional. I think a lot of people posting havn't experienced it. Good luck. I know I'm not really giving you much advice, but I do know what he is feeling.
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