#1 · Edited by: luceiia
...continued from previous post.
You'll want to know if the jocker wants to "put you on the block" (which unfortunately is pretty common), whether he has ever shot up haves (and therefore might carry the AIDS virus), whether he'll settle for head or insists you give up your ass as well, whether he'll allow anyone else to fuck your ass or keep it for himself, whether he'll loan you out to his buddies, whether he wants to cell with you, and what the relationship means to him.
Check out how serious the guy is. Protective pairing is a very serious matter for him as well, since it obligates him to put his life on the line if necessary to keep you from harm, and if you are foolish or stupid and fuck up, he may have to suffer for your mistake. Ask him about any previous catchers he's had and how they managed together and why they split. If any of them are still around, talk with them. Ask him what he feels his responsibilities would be and what yours would be. Also ask about canteen arrangements.
Jockers may well insist on having sex with you before putting a claim on you. It's not an unreamisterable demand, since sex is such an important part of the deal, and if he's willing to limit himself to head it makes sense for him to find out if you can satisfy him that way. But make sure you're both serious first, or anybody could use it as an excuse to go up in you. You can tell a lot about a jock by how he behaves with you sexually. If he breaks contact with you right after he comes, it may be a sign of discomfort and guilt on his part or that he sees you as just a piece of meat. On the other hand, if a jock stays with you for a while after he comes, even stays inside you, it may be a sign that he likes your company and is attracted to you as a permister and not just a sex object. Also, if a jock shows affection with you, such as stroking your body or hair, it is a good indication that he wants to treat you as a human being.
Ask jockers how they treat their women, because most jockers treat their punks the same way. If they form real partnerships with their women, they are more likely to do the same with you.
As a new punk you won't know diddly-squat about your sexual duties, so here are a few practical tips: to avoid AIDS, learn to suck dick. In fact, learn it so well you can do deep throat and he'll forget all about your ass. The trick is relaxation, not easy at first, to be sure, when you feel the whole thing is absolutely disgusting, but for your own good, you need to learn to relax using any technique that works for you. In order to avoid gagging, wait til your stomach is empty (1½ hrs after meals), so there's nothing to barf. If you do throw up, do it on the floor and not him! Train yourself gradually. Meditate, say mantras, anything that gets you to relax. Stop thinking of the dick as an invading foreign object; if you can get over that perception, you'll be OK. Try to take deep breaths whenever you can and breathe through your nose. Practice holding your breath like a swimmer. If he fucks your skull so hard you think you're about to pass out from fetishtion, you should grab his legs and signal your distress. Most likely he'll be about to come and won't let up, but it'll be over real soon.
The first few times you get fucked in the ass, it hurts bigtime. If you have to get fucked in the ass, again try to relax as much as possible and get him to slow down. It will hurt less, and if it keeps happening you will get used to it and it won't hurt at all. Be sure to use some kind of greasy stuff (vaseline, hair cream, etc.) as a lubricant, and a condom if at all possible. If you are hooked up, your jocker will usually try to minimize any pain that might be involved. After all, he wants to keep your resentment and complaints to a minimum.
A dick up your ass may well physically stimulate your prostate gland, and you may experience that as pleasurable. You may even get a hard-on while being fucked, just as a physical reaction. And some punks will find the sexual experience arousing. Many guys have some homosexual feelings even though they are basically straight. You don't have to put a label on yourself just because you have a variety of feelings.
Punks sometimes agree to switch out with each other or "take turns" sexually, since this is about the only way you can take a penetrative role instead of a passive one. As a punk you come under a lot of pressure to act less masculine, and you will naturally resent this pressure inside and feel a strong need to act in masculine ways whenever you can get away with it. This need can make the urge to experience what a lot of people call "the male role" in sex very powerful. It is an understandable compensation, a way of proving to yourself that you're still a man, so if you do it, don't feel guilty about it. If you want to take turns with another punk, it is best to clear it with your jockers first. The jocks usually don't object since they know the other punk is not a rival for them.
When your "man" treats you bad and you want to get out of the situation, it's a tricky situation, but it's not hopeless. Maybe he's dissatisfied too and is willing to let you go, in which case you are back to square two. If he wants to keep you, he may get violent to do so. You can check in to p.c. and get transferred as one way out. Another way is to let other jockers know that you want to switch and encourage one of them to make a deal with your current jock to take you over. He may buy out your contract, so to speak. Sometimes if he wants you badly enough he'll fight your current daddy in order to get you.
A punk who successfully breaks away from his jocker and becomes independent is called a "renegade." There are also some independent punks who never hook up. Unless such punks have learned to fight well, they usually end up with another jocker.
Human beings are remarkably adaptable creatures. It is true that if you become a punk and are locked up for a long time, you will get somewhat used to the punk role. This varies a lot from one punk to another. Some still hate every sex act after a decade of doing it every day. Others focus on other aspects of it and find some value in those aspects. Some treasure the security it brings. Many punks who have good relationships actually become fond of their jockers. It is not even so uncommon, in the unusual conditions of confinement, for two straight guys to fall in love with each other over time. Psychologists generally consider adaptation to be a healthy reaction to a situation which you cannot change, so don't worry about it if you find yourself adapting to the role. Once you are out you can reverse the process and work on reclaiming the full expression of your masculine identity.
Unfortunately, many (if not most) jockers will try to get their punks to be as feminine in appearance and behavior as possible. That is because they are more comfortable pretending they are relating sexually to some kind of female than to another male. But they also know that you are a punk, not a queen, and that such things don't come naturally to you. You should ask about such things before accepting a claim, and make it clear that retaining your masculine identity is important to you. Some jockers don't care; I was hooked up once with a guy who let me grow a moustache! Most will still call you "him" and use your male name. Others may insist that you shave your legs and grow long hair and get a feminine nickname. No matter what you have to do, remember that it is all an act and you can go back to your normal behavior as soon as you get out.
Sex is a very complex experience. It has many aspects which have nothing to do with lust. Being penetrated is an intense experience; it can give you an adrenaline rush. Being touched can be a pleasant experience, regardless of the sex of the permister touching you. Being held has been a comforting experience for most people since they were babies, and it can seem very protective in an environment where gang-r4pe is a grim reality. Being desired can seem like a tempting alternative to being ignored, especially if you've been ignored all your life. Intimacy itself can be very powerfully attractive if you feel isolated and lonely. It is quite possible that you may delve further into these feelings, which are general human feelings. That doesn't mean you are sexually turned on to the guy, it doesn't mean there's lust or sexual arousal or homosexual inclinations. Besides, if experiences alone determined a permister's sexuality, we'd all be in love with our hands.
That's a lot of advice, but if it's a whole new world for you, you'll need it. Good luck finding a decent man, and remember you will leave it all behind (except for a much better understanding of men and of women!) when you walk out the front gate.