Have I been Cuckolded (Reverse Cuckold)

I have been having an affair with my Girlfriend(she is married) for 14 years. She is hot italian 46 i'm 45, she was my boss at work originally and started affair. Early in the affair we had sex quite regularly but that stopped a few years back as she said no more freebees. The only thing I have been allowed to do with her about once/twice a year is eat her pussy. I now work at a different company from her. The only time i'm allowed to correspond with her now is early in the morning by email asking if she is free to be picked up after work to be driven home. She says yes or no and I reply thank you. She expects me to pick up coffee for her when she meets me. When I drive her home and we are stuck in traffic i have seen her making seductive eyes with guys in other cars and them reacting similarly and ignoring i am there. She has suggested a threesome with another guy in the past although I was/am too in love with her to think of it. Some of the things she has said in the last week or so as we drive home is she thought she was pregnant but just confirmed she was not. Other old boyfriends still meet her for lunch. She is going to LaSenza lingerie store as next weekend her and her husband are going on a boat cruise and will be staying at the number 1 hotel in town for a great night afterwards. She said she has bought special smelling creams from the lingerie store to keep them in the mood. She also will be going away in August on vacation to various hotels with him.

I will be on vacation a week from now. I told her and she said that is great as it will allow me more time to devote to picking her up at even more convienent times and locations for her. She also said it will give me time to pickup lingerie for her. She has made fun of my penis as iI have gottened stressed while attempting to have sex with her in the past and have not completed the act. That is why she relegated me to pussy eating which she does not allow much either. I asked last week for some pussy eating and she said in my dreams and I should just go play with myself. The main thing she wants is for me to be there when she wants me otherwise I just have to wait/hope she will let me pick her up. I guess my problem is I tell her I love her when I drop her of at night and she says be sure to email me next work day and I will let you know if i'm available. She obviously is very dominant.

Have I become a cuckold? and i'm the boyfriend.

Today she said she had a great time with her husband in the hot tu last night. She could not even remember the last time we had sex which was last August and it was oral sex me giving her that she allowed then. She said was that not a couple of years ago. She says she may give me something if i complete chores at my place she wants done. But she doubts I can meet her standards. She also wants to change some of the ways I dress. This whole week i have been on vacation and have had to drive into city to pick her up. She is always late and oreders me to pickup coffee for her and has hinted at sexy underwear pickups for her as well. she will be going on vacation soon and says I won't hear from her for that time as she will be having a great time elsewhere. You would say why don't I get away from her. But she is a hot italien brunette bitch mid-forties whom is great at sex... if I ever got any. All i know is I have jealous pains in my stomach and can't relax...we will see what tomorrow brings. All I know is when I think of things I get hard as rock.

I apologize for the bump but his post should not have gone unanswered.

Green, while you do exhibit many characteristics of a cuck, I believe you're more of just a 'wimp'.

You're not her boyfriend. You're her boytoy. She's using you. And her blatant lack of care for you is fueling your infatuation.

This woman doesn't respect you, and as long as that remains the case, she'll never be attracted to you.

Move on, find an equally attractive woman and rub it in her face. This is your best chance at changing the way she sees you, and regaining her attraction.

It's a win/win situation for you.